‘Like Messi or Ronaldo’ – ‘obsessed’ Haaland ‘ridiculous and rare’

Haaland: The Goal-Raking Machine Who’s Revolutionizing Football

Erling Haaland is on the absolute tear! The Norwegian strikers are shattering goalscoring records left, right, and center. With his jaw-dropping performances, he’s making coaches and defenders alike go green-eyed.

The 100th game, another benchmark, and yet another milestone as Haaland celebrated his 100th appearance with his 91st goal. And did we just say his stats are INSANE?! In his inaugural season, Haaland scored a ludicrous 52 goals in 53 games.

The likes of Pep Guardiola, his coach, compared him to footballing legends Messis and Cristiano Ronaldo. "His numbers are those of the great Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo," Guardiola gushed. "They’ve controlled the last decade and 15 years and absolutely everything."

Haaland’s minutes-per-goal ratio is stunning – one goal every 85 minutes to be precise! Former Liverpool, Manchester City, and Tottenham fans can only nod in wonder as the stats pile up – 91 goals in 100 matches. You do the maths!

We caught up with ex-England international pundit Jamie Redknapp, who effused, "When you see him play, you forget about other strikers for a few days. He brought strikers back into fashion and now, all managers want the best no. 9 spot."

Another footballing behemoth, former Manchester City defender Micah Richards, sang Haaland’s praises. "He’s having to adapt his game, which is exactly what you deserve credit for. Those runs create space, and suddenly, other players are getting to benefit from that."

Haaland himself admitted he wants to constantly improve and even score more assists!

So, Cucurella, you think you can keep up?!

In this battle of stats and goals, who’s going to wear the crown?

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Can Haaland Get Even Better?

This Norwegian sensation took just 18 minutes to respond to Spanish full-back Marc Cucurella’s off-season jitters. A goal in half the time! Haaland demonstrated his lightning-fast reflexes.

But that’s not all – He wants to score more assists?! "I want to help the team work and get other players in better positions"

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